Obscurity
by Hannibal-Hopkins
Summary: Lost way up on the hill, Clarice looks out over the view. What will become of her picture? Please R&R....{Updated]
1. Default Chapter

_Disclaimer_ - I in no way own the characters of Dr Hannibal Lecter and Clarice Starling. They both belong to the genius that is Thomas Harris, I've just merely borrowed them for a moment. I am not making any profit whatsoever from them.  
  
_A/N_ - Lost way up on the hill, Clarice looks out over the view. Please read and review as all feedback is welcomed.  
  
As always, thanks sis for once again working your usual editing magic. I'll try not to keep you in suspense for the next fix ;)

Tata, H.

**Obscurity**  
  
The rain pounded upon and ran down her face; the wind blew her hair like the tail of a kite. The view from up here was panoramic. The height to which she'd climbed made the world, with all its confines, shrink but refuse to disappear. The chains still held their grip, binding her ankles together. Up on her hill she looked down upon the mess below...everything empty and cold in its embrace...it left her tired and alone. Clarice no longer had the strength to move, where she sat now was where she'd dropped from exhaustion. She longed for warmth, to be wanted, needed, loved, to have a sense of belonging. It had taken her this long to realize this, to know what she wanted. Slowly she stood, raised her head to the dark shadows of the sky....eyes closed, the distress evident on her features as if in physical pain. She felt it rise within her chest, the despair, angst and desperation wracking her body to the core. It was useless to try and stop it from spilling out so she let it come forth, filling the darkness with a wail she screamed out into the oblivion, "HANNIBAL WHERE ARE YOU? I NEED YOU!"  
  
At first she thought it was that voice inside of her head, "I'm right here Clarice." She turned toward it, her heart frozen in time with hope, and saw him standing there, his arms open inviting her into the warmth of his embrace. The shackles broke and fell away; the murkiness began to lift, it seemed like everything had begun to come up roses. Starling walked forward into the security of his touch; his arms came around and tucked her into his warmth. Pulling back they looked into each others eyes until he spoke "Let's go..." nodding she turned to stand at his side and walked stride for stride with him towards all their tomorrows.  
  
They were walking and looking ahead, both were silent. Clarice noticed everything had gone silent; there was no sound at all. Come to think of it, they were walking but going nowhere. Panic set in as the knot in her gut tightened, something wasn't right. She stopped in her tracks, the distance ahead of them was changing, it was beginning to swirl and mesh together. She turned to Hannibal, turned for the support and reassurance she craved at this precise moment; he'd too started to disintegrate before her very eyes! The vortex ahead, that had been the future, sucked him in and away from her. Clarice brought her hands up to cover her eyes from it all, she tried to scream but nothing came out, her hands had gone. Her whole body was becoming sand blowing in the wind, she couldn't stop it, she tried but the vortex was getting nearer and nearer. Starling was being sucked in.....into the black hole, into nothingness.  
  
She shot up; sweat dripping off her, gasping for breath. A slight breeze came in through the window by her bed, cooling her somewhat. It took a few moments for her to orientate herself; she was in her own bed in her own bedroom. It had all been a dream; the whole thing had been a dream!! It had seemed so real though, all the feelings, and he had felt so real almost as if he actually had been holding her. The reality that it was a dream hit her like a lead weight....the feelings of abandonment, loneliness, being alone came back and set up home once more in her consciousness. Laying back down she let out a tired sigh, "Just another dream, I'm still here all by myself." The darkness of the room cocooned her until a jolt ran through her body, like lightening, causing her to jump.  
  
"No Clarice.....you're not alone at all."


	2. The calm before the Storm

The usual disclaimer applies......the characters still belong to TH.  
  
**Chapter 2**  
  
_"The calm before the Storm"_  
  
Clarice bolted upright and sat staring into the darkness trying to find where the voice had come from. Shaking her head as if to get the whole scene to fade away, "I'm still dreaming...this is the nightmare I was having, I just need to wake up and it will all be fine," she tried to convince herself but wasn't having much success.  
  
"Wrong again, Clarice! This is no longer the dream you were having. You're very much awake and I'm really here." His voice sounded from across the dark corner of her room, yet it rang out in her head as if he were standing next to her and whispering it into her ear. Bringing her knees up to her chest and pulling the covers up around her neck she looked like a lost and lonely lamb. Rising from the shadows, he walked slowly over towards the bed, stopping only when he stood in the moonlight. Clarice had that ice cold feeling run through her gut at exactly the same time as she went hot.....he was here, standing in front of her, Dr. Hannibal Lecter was here!!  
  
She couldn't move, speak or breathe....it was as if she'd ceased to live. Dr. Lecter remained where he was. Standing 6 feet away from her bed, from his little Starling, watching and wondering. The not knowing was tearing him up, "What are you thinking Clarice?" It wasn't a demand; it was a genuine concerned enquiry. She just stared at him, the covers still round her neck, "I'm thinking....what the hell is Hannibal Lecter doing inside my bedroom!?" She surprised herself with how she kept her voice from shaking with the shock and turmoil she was feeling inside. "Even more...how did you get in here!?" He began to smile, she had begun to relax and challenge him, "That's the Starling I know, you haven't changed one bit since we saw each other last. Hmmmm, let me see..." He pondered her question playfully looking up, holding his chin between thumb and forefinger to add emphasis, "You really should be more vigilant with your windows Clarice, you never know who could climb in through them and enter your bedroom without your knowledge." he winked playfully at her. Her blood was up, he was toying with her. "How dare you! What gives you the right to invite yourself into my room, without my permission and watch me without my knowledge!?" She got up and walked over to the window, shutting it with force to relay the fact that she was angry at him. Dr. Lecter watched her intently, a small smile playing on his features. He noted she was wearing dark snug fitting jogging bottoms and a white tank top, her hair was down and sat nicely, which was surprising after all the tossing and turning she'd been doing. He was still standing at the side of her bed, watching her every move. She turned around and returned to her bed, this time sitting on top of the covers with her back against the wall. She stared ahead, not talking to him. "Clarice?" Her silence was once more concerning him. "What!" she looked up and crossed her arms on her chest. "May I sit down with you?" His voice was calm, hers was not. "Why even ask....you have this habit of doing things without seeking permission, especially when I'm concerned" she spat back and once more stared ahead, clenching her jaw. He approached her bed slowly, giving her time to withdraw the 'permission'. He sat on the side, turned slightly so he could see her.  
  
"I suspect you're angry at me for coming here, for this happening tonight" his face was soft but apprehensive. Her gaze met his, she was angry, he could see that for himself "NO SHIT SHERLOCK!! I have a bad dream, wake up to find, what I think, is the same old normal surroundings. That I'm still in my room ALONE, so I reassure myself about it, then what happens?? You announce your presence and throw everything into the air." He sat listening to her words and couldn't deny the feeling of depletion running through his veins, this wasn't how he'd imagined it to be. He knew Clarice would be shocked, a little angry even, but not to this extent. Hannibal Lecter was not one to do things on a whim, he planned things, but she had an effect on him that no other had. He had hoped and longed for this moment, wondered what they'd be feeling...all he was feeling now was regret. He looked down at the floor as he spoke "I'm sorry Clarice, this was a mistake. I shouldn't have made my presence known, forgive me. I think its best I should leave" he got up and looked at her once more, her face was blank. "Good bye Clarice." He walked towards the door, ready to go out into the night and enter back into the shadows.  
  
"Dr. Lecter! Please don't go, I don't want you to go..."  
  
_To be continued......_


	3. Ask and you shall receive

**Chapter 3**  
_Ask and you shall receive  
_  
Lecter had stopped in his tracks, hand still on the handle and the door slightly ajar. She had asked him to stay and of her own accord too. He turned to look back at her; she'd risen from the bed and was walking towards him  
  
"Come with me, please" she was now at his side refusing to meet his gaze. Dr. Lecter opened the door that lead out onto the top of the stairs and followed Clarice downstairs.  
  
They both sat at either end of the kitchen table, each clutching a cup of earl grey tea, the vapor rising and disappearing into the atmosphere. The lights over the counter tops were switched on and provided a sufficient glow to the dark room. Clarice sat staring at her cup, lost in thought, battling the feelings and emotions inside. Dr. Lecter sat watching, with his head titled to one and his right arm brought up to rest on the chair back. The regret he'd experienced in her bedroom was making his guts churn. Clarice Starling could do many things to him, make him feel many things, and at this precise moment she was making him feel like running away and acting as if he'd been the one having the nightmare. He had to do something before he followed his instincts and ran away.  
  
"Are we going to stay here sit in silence all night, Clarice?"  
  
She took a sip of her tea and pondered the question. Setting the cup back onto the table she began to absently play with the ring it had left on the table top. Never looking up from the absent doodling, "That all depends on you doesn't it?" Raising his eyebrows in feigned shock "On me, how so?" Finally she made eye contact with him, the anger still burned in her; this was going to be good he mused. "I want some answers, doctor, and I want them now!!" Her fist slammed down next to the cup, knocking it slightly. A smile spread across Dr. Lecter's face at her determination, "Ahhhh, the Starling's cage is rattled and she wants to ask questions. Ok Clarice I'll play your little game, fire away." She looked him dead in the eye and asked "Why?" offering him no more she waited for him to respond.  
  
"Why what, Clarice? You could be more specific with the question!!" his tone was low and playful.  
  
"Don't fuck about with me; you know exactly what I mean Doctor! Why disappear for those years? Why come back after this amount of time? How come you chose me? Do I need to go on any further to clarify things for you?" her anger had yet to subside.  
  
Dr. Lecter sat in his chair and watched as Clarice shouted at him, any other person would not have been so fortunate as to get away with it. She was different to others he'd met. She was feisty, determined, courteous and not at all self centred. Nothing she did was for personal gain; she treated others as she'd want to be treated herselfâ€more often than not getting nothing back in return. She had set up home in his head during the first meeting in the basement. He'd walk through the fires of hell for her, do anything for her and also had the knowledge that she felt the same, even if she did refuse to accept it. He didn't believe in God, but if he did she would be that God His eyes were firmly transfixed upon the person in front of him; she looked radiant, even more when she was angry. She was right though, he did owe her an explanation.  
  
"Before we begin Clarice, I have one question for you"  
  
Her eyes were fixed upon his "What?"  
  
"This isn't some kind of trap to stall me whilst the good old FBI are on their way is it?"  
  
Disbelief now clouded her face "You think I¹d do something like that? You really think I'd contact the FBI and keep you in my house? Do you know how that would look to them? The FBI agent having the prize asset on the 'Ten most wanted' drinking tea with her at the kitchen table. They'd all put two and two together and make five. So the answer is no, I've not contacted them nor do I have any desire to, Dr. Hannibal Lecter is safe for the moment!! Besides I thought you knew me better than that?" Starling had no idea what she'd just done, but the subtle smile on his face relayed the fact, once more, that her feelings for him were the same as he had for her. She wouldn¹t turn him in. "I was just checking Clarice, my freedom means a lot to me and I won¹t go back in chains, you should also know that by now." A short silence fell over them both. Dr. Lecter was the first to break it, "I believe you had a few questions you wanted to ask me?" For the first time she relaxed a little, settling down into her chair she began to get the answers she wanted, her voice sounded a lot calmer than she felt though "I'd like to know where you went once you'd escaped in Memphis?"  
  
"Clarice, I'm sure you can understand I'm unable to give you my exact whereabouts once I got to a safer destination, purely because I may need to retreat there again someday. If you're asking what happened straight after my escape......."  
  
Clarice cut him off, "I know you killed the ambulance technicians and a tourist. Then what did you do?"  
  
"You already know what I did."  
  
"I NEED TO HEAR IT FOR MYSELF!" Her anger had once more boiled to the surface. "I've killed people for being a lot less rude than you are at the moment, if you lowered your voice you'd find you would be a lot calmer and more in control of yourself."  
  
"Is that a threat Doctor?"  
  
"Just merely an observation Clarice, nothing more. Now would you like me to continue because if not then I will be on my way." He caught the slight flicker of panic, and intake of air, cross her face. "No, please continue"  
  
"As I'm sure you know, I used the tourist's identity for a short while until I could get myself established and a few steps ahead of the authorities. You are aware that I tracked down and brought Freddy Chilton's existence to a fitting conclusion. Once I'd left the scene I retreated into the shadows and disappeared. No one has any idea of who I am, I am known by many aliases and always make sure to cover my tracks; after all we wouldn¹t want any mishaps to happen now would we?" He gave her a little wink at the last words. "Nobody is aware that I have returned to the US and am sitting here with you at this very moment."  
  
She sat listening intently to him, hypnotized by his every word. She was not the FBI agent now she was just plain Clarice Starling, and she had no desire to call for backup or to attempt an arrest on him. Clarice was content with the ways things were, she felt happy with the way they were sitting and talking together. She finally realised he'd stopped with his explanation; he was not going to elaborate any more than he¹d already done so, so she asked another question "Why did you choose me?"  
  
"Simple, you made me choose you!"  
  
Clarice looked slightly puzzled at his response, "I made you!! How so?"

"You treated me as a human being. No one had done that for a long time. You saw past the crimes and my new found reputation and saw the man underneath. You were always courteous and receptive to courtesy; you battled me intellectually and shared yourself with me. I knew from our first meeting, in the dungeon, you were different. The first words you spoke told me so......you asked for my permission to speak with me; nobody who had come to see me had ever done that. You created quite an impression, one that has remained with me until this very day. I chose you because I saw the drive and passion inside, I knew you would do all that you could to get the result.......you're a fighter Clarice, always have been and always will be. You know what you want and you will do all things necessary to get it. I'd never experienced that with any of the others, you were imprinted in my memory never to be erased away."  
  
Slightly embarrassed at his frankness she tried to hide it but knew she was unsuccessful. "Thank you Doctor, I've always wondered what made me different from the others, now I know." She sat messing with the handle of her cup, unsure of what question to ask next or if she wanted to know. "Dr. Lecter, why did you come back after all this time?" He knew there was only one reason why he had done so, but found himself avoiding it entirely, "To tie up a few loose ends." A slight look of disappointment pained Clarice; the answer wasn't sitting to well with her. "What type of loose ends?"  
  
"You ask a lot of questions don't you?" he joked with her.  
  
"I've had a lot of practice! A small smile creased her features. Lecter couldn¹t let it pass, "You should smile more often Clarice, it suits you."  
  
"If didn't know better, Doctor, I'd say you were trying to flirt with me." she was unable to stop the words flying out before she realized what she'd just said.  
"Maybe I am, Clarice" He leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table determined to correct his mistake at answering her previous question. "There was another reason I came back..." Clarice remained silent. "I thought that once I'd escaped and had my freedom I would be content for the rest of my life. For the first few years I was, I enjoyed the feeling of being able to go out when and where I wanted, do what I wanted and with whom I wanted. Over time it changed, I had a void inside of me that couldn't to be filled, no matter how free I was. There was only one way and one person who could do that." Hannibal got up from where he was sitting and walked to her side, he bent down to look directly at her, his maroon eyes fixed upon her blue, "You were what I wanted. I knew then I couldn't live another day without seeing you, so I came back for you. I've been coming here for months to watch you sleep, content at seeing you but always wanting more. Longing to talk with you, to hold you and dare I say it, to kiss you! You hold the key to my heart Clarice. I'm in love with you and want you all to myself, to finally have my little Starling."  
  
She shook her head as if to get his words from echoing around her head "No no on no no NO!!" was all she could say. Dr. Lecter was expressionless while watching the turmoil she was in. He knew she was battling her feelings, trying to suppress them as she had done so many times in the past. Now was the time she had to admit them to herselfâ€.now was the time she could no longer hide from them. She stood up and went towards the front door "I need to get out of here; I need to clear my head."  
  
Lecter went towards her, "Clarice you're hardly dressed for an expedition outside, you don¹t even have any shoes on." Turning to face him and opening the door at the same time, "See if I care..." and with that she ran out into the cold night air.

_More to follow on soon_


End file.
